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Sailor Ranko: The Harder They Fall: Chapter 18, Going Home.
Rebecca Ann Heineman

Ranma 1/2 and the characters therein are the property of Rumiko Takahashi. Based on "Sailor Ranko" by Duncan Zillman and "Twice in a Millennium" by Kevin D. Hammel.

I don't own these characters. Please don't sue me, kill me or give me a massive headache after striking me with a mallet.

Nick Tatopoulos surveyed the giant body of the dead Godzilla as he stood in a street filled with soldiers and rescue teams. He craned his head skyward to look at the top of the giant spikes on the creature's back that literally touched the sky. The entire street stank of rotting meat so Nick wore a surgical mask and rubber gloves that did little to protect him from the overpowering stench.

He picked up a chuck of the leathery Godzilla skin that was strewn about the pavement taking care not to damage the specimen he held. Nick examined the burn marks that covered one side of the chunk of meat that he turned end over end in his hands. He looked up again and wondered what weapon was used that caused the death of this magnificent creature since it didn't look like the same wounds that the missile attack in New York left in the original beast. He had heard that the strange girls he saw the day before possessed supernatural powers and thought if they were the ones responsible for the thing's death. The Japanese agent that had left him here refused to tell him exactly how the creatures died, so Nick was left to speculate and guess as to what happened in the final minutes of the Godzilla's life.

Nick walked as close to the body as he dared to. A giant ribcage precariously teetered on the brink of falling into the street to cause more damage than was already present on the nearby buildings. He pulled out a plastic bag from his jacket and gently inserted the body fragment safely inside it for its trip to his laboratory back home for future study.

Dr. Tatopoulos spent many hours photographing the area, the egg chamber inside the body and the numerous dead babies. He placed dozens of collected samples into several large ice chests hoping that somehow, someday, some good will come from all that had happened both from the New York attack and the recent Tokyo incursion. He reflected on the outcome and couldn't figure out how anything might have been different. A Godzilla could not be captured and kept in a zoo. There was no reasonable way that humans and Godzilla could share the planet. It was either them or us; there was no other outcome. The humans had won this battle and hopefully the war.

Nick stared down the street gawking at the vast number of dead babies. In New York City, they thought they had killed all the children and now he was witness to how wrong they were. He gulped at the thought that any babies could have survived this massacre. He dreaded the idea of a future rematch with even more spawn of Godzilla. He silently hoped that that day would never come, but at the same time he deeply regretted the extinction of a truly unique species of creature that he had the privilege of being able to study first hand. He turned to the ice chest near him and placed the last sample inside.

The sound of the ice chest lid being slammed shut was the last thing Nick heard before his cell phone rang. He pulled off his gloves and slowly fumbled around his jacket until he pulled the phone out. He pulled down his mask and coughed as the odor filled his nose. "Ack! Nick here."

A familiar friend from France was on the line. "It was good working with you again. Sorry, but my remaining time here is short. You'll find a first class ticket to New York waiting for you at the Air France ticket counter. It will get you home when you've finished your work there."

Nick smiled at the sound of Philippe's voice. "The feeling is mutual my friend. I rather enjoyed our little adventure together." He coughed from the stench. "However, let's not do this again anytime soon if you know what I mean. Oh, you should drop by my office at the university the next time you're in the states. I've got a neat collection of artifacts I'd think you'd like to see."

Philippe turned to look at his surroundings from the pay phone he was in. When he felt certain he wasn't being monitored, he continued. "I'll probably do that someday. However, I'm taking a long vacation right now so I'll be out of touch for a while. Au revoir my friend." He hung up the phone with an air of sadness. The French agent straightened out his coat and walked off into the crowd for his rendezvous in the French Alps. He had a long date planned with a pair of skis.

Nick clicked off his phone and slipped it back into his pocket. He looked down the street at the multitude of helicopters, troops, smoke clouds, destruction and the massive hunk of rotting flesh piled high from the corpse of a giant dead Godzilla.

Nick got into the passenger side of the military jeep he was assigned by the Japanese secret service. The ice chests were safely stowed in the back, ready for the trip home. "Driver, take me to the Tokyo International Airport." He pause and smiled. "Air France terminal."

The driver nodded. "Hai!" He started the engine, signaled and drove off down the street into the distance. They were eventually obscured by smoke from a smoldering building. Nick's adventure in Tokyo drew to a close.


"Nihao, great-grandmother!" Shampoo entered the empty Cat Cafe after a very long walk from Juuban hospital. She was exhausted from lack of sleep and her vigil at Ukyou's bedside. The Amazon sighed as her suitor approached.

"My darling Shampoo!" Mousse ran to his love with open arms. He almost reached the purple haired girl of his dreams before darkness took him as he ran straight into the support beam. He wrapped his arms around the pole as he slowly slid down to the floor to take an unplanned nap.

Shampoo peered at his body as it sprawled on the floor. "Stupid Mousse. Why Mousse no put on glasses? Mousse no make good husband when Mousse no see." She reached for a glass of water from a nearby table and threw the contents on the hidden weapons master changing him into his fowl form. She reached down to pick up the quiet duck and continued to walk to the back room.

Cologne watched the altercation intently. She had numerous questions about the previous nights activities and waited with the patience of the ages for the opportunity to ask. "Great granddaughter, put Mousse in his pen and sit with me child." The matriarch hopped to an empty booth waiting for Shampoo to finish putting the duck in his pen. The young girl slowly trudged to the booth and plopped down in the seat across from Cologne.

"Nihao..." Shampoo was able utter before resting her weary head on the table. "Shampoo need new bike."

Cologne nodded. "I see. I would like to know what happened to your clothes." The elder pointed at a rip in Shampoo's dress sleeve with her cane. "Your dress is almost ruined but your skin doesn't have a scratch. Tell me..." Cologne's eyes sparked with an evil happy thought. "You didn't by any chance spend some time with your husband? Maybe you got a little rough with him perhaps? Or was he the one who was rough with you?" She gave out a small laugh at the mere thought that Ranma had consummated his marriage with Shampoo. The old woman knew the chances were almost zero, but she had to ask.

Shampoo for the first time noticed that her dress was torn up and she bordered on being arrested for indecency. Several cuts in the fabric had shown skin where skin was not supposed to be seen. "Oh, Shampoo sad. Dress one of Shampoo's favorite."

Cologne deduced that sharp objects, knives, or possibly claws cut the dress. But the girl's skin underneath was baby smooth and utterly flawless. "Shampoo, why are you not scratched up?" She pondered a question and came to a logical conclusion. "Were you healed by someone? The Senshi perhaps?"

Shampoo bubbled with happiness while sitting up straight. "Yes great grandmother, Senshi called Sailor Saturn touched Shampoo and make pain go away. See." Shampoo rolled up her sleeve to expose her shoulder. The shoulder once had a scar that she had gotten in training years ago but now had no trace of the old wound. "Senshi make mark go away."

"Impressive. Now, why were you injured? Were you fighting alongside Ranma?" Cologne hoped the answer would be something she wanted to here.

Shampoo released her sleeve and slumped back down on the table. "No, Shampoo no find Ranma. Shampoo find Spatula Girl and Pervert Boy. Shampoo fight to protect Senshi. Shampoo bring honor to tribe." She closed her eyes resting on her folded arms with a smile on her face.

"You? You protected the Senshi?" The small old woman raised her eyebrows in delight. Shampoo closed her eyes and fell asleep from exhaustion. "Now, this is a change of events I didn't foresee. Hmm..." Cologne held her hand to her chin in deep thought. "Maybe you'll bring honor to the tribe without Ranma after all." Cologne poked Shampoo with her walking stick to wake her up but the girl was out like a light.

Cologne picked up her great granddaughter and carried her off to bed. She tucked her in and shut off the lights. "Sleep well Shampoo. We'll discuss what happened later. I've much to think about." She turned to leave but stopped in the doorway. "Now, where was Ranma in all of this?"


It had been running for hours. The smell of humans was ingrained in its mind as something to avoid. It watched dozens of its siblings die as these black furred animals spat out flashes of fire and made its companions fall where they stood in agonizing death. It did the only thing it could do. It ran. It ran as fast as it could and used the cover of night and the underground tunnels to hide its tracks.

It had to find the open sea. It had to find freedom. It had to escape.


Sailor Venus rubbed her head as she came to. "Where am I?"

Jupiter was already awake but kneeling on the hospital floor next to Ukyou's bed. "You're dead."

Venus got teary eyed. "I... I'm dead? I'm too old to die."

Sailor Io coughed. "Old? You mean you're too young to die."

Venus wept. "That too! I can't be dead! I've got my whole life to live! Who... Who's going to take care of Artemis?"

Ukyou was staring at the orange-skirted Senshi in disbelief. "Uh... You're not dead sugar." She glared at Jupiter. "But I think your friend doesn't have long to live."

Venus stopped weeping giving a googly eyed look while holding her hands under her chin in a very girlish fashion. "I'm not dead? Wait. Jupiter! I'm sorry you're going to die!" Venus started pouring out the tears at a rate that would have made Soun Tendo proud. "Sailor Moon! Jupiter needs help!"

Ukyou groaned and turned to Sailor Sun who was sitting in a chair next to her bed. "Why did you join these guys? Why?"

Sun buried her head in her hands hoping to disappear. "I was drafted. Ok?"

"And you sugar, what's your excuse?" The chef directed her question to Sailor Io.

Io just rolled her eyes in response.

The rest of the Senshi, one by one, got up from off the floor to admire the work they had done on Ukyou's leg. Sailor Saturn was the last to stir and her mother held her tight. Neptune whispered into her daughter's ear. "You did it! I knew you could, I just knew it." She kissed her daughter on the cheek and embraced her with pride.

Her future daughter, Neo Moon, lifted Sailor Moon off of the floor. "C'mon mom, get up." Sailor Moon staggered over to an empty chair and sat down.

Sailor Pluto entered the hospital room with a tray of cups filled with orange juice. "Here you go everyone, I'm certain you're all thirsty right now."

The girls looked at each other for a moment, then each one took a cup and quickly drank the juice. None of them knew why they were so thirsty at that precise moment, but Pluto always had a way of knowing what needed to be done before anyone else.

Pluto set down the empty tray and stood next to the door. "Well, it's a little crowded here and Saturn needs to rest." She looked at Uranus as she finished her drink. "Looks like you lose."

Sailor Uranus scratched her head under her tiara. "Fine, I'll pay up when we get home." Uranus muttered to herself. "Last time I make a bet with you."

The ageless Senshi gave out an uncustomary giggle. "Fat chance. I told you that we could do it." She reached out to touch Neptune and Uranus. "Let's go home." The four outer Senshi instantly vanished with Sailor Pluto's time stream teleportation.

Ukyou called out to the departing Senshi. "Wait!" As they faded away she continued in a normal voice. "Thank you." Ukyou was holding her new hand before her face gazing at the simple beauty of the texture of the skin. She spoke to the remaining Senshi. "I can't thank all of you enough. Anytime you're in Nerima, you're welcome to a free meal at my place."

Mercury interjected. "It's we who wish to thank you Ukyou. If it wasn't for your quick thinking, I wouldn't want to think about what could have happened to Pluto and Saturn."

Neo Moon felt it was time to inform her teammates of everything Ukyou did. "She saved your life Mercury. Io's too."

Sailor Mercury turned her eyes to Neo Moon to correct her. "My life? Well maybe, she did fight to protect me at the furniture store but Io wasn't there." Io scratched her head trying to remember when and where could have Ukyou saved her life.

Neo Moon brushed off the dust from her white, yellow and blue Super Sailor Moon skirt. "Well, she saved your life a second time in the store. The first time was when she dusted that giant Godzilla that was about to have you and Io for dinner."

Sailor Io eyes bugged out remembering how that Godzilla literally exploded while she was digging out Sailor Mercury. She pointed her finger at Ukyou. "W-was that you? Was it you that shot that giant Godzilla and killed it? I... I thought that Sailor Saturn did that. I mean. It looked like her magic attack."

Ukyou blushed in embarrassment since she barely remembered what happened when she fired the Silence Glaive. "Yes, it was Saturn's staff. She let me borrow her weapon and I used it."

Sun stood up next to her childhood friend. "What? How? I thought only Saturn could use that thing."

Sailor Moon stared at Ukyou. "Wait a minute! No one can use anyone else's... Oh, wait... Uh... I take that back." She pulled out her moon disguise pen thinking how most of the Senshi had used it to play tricks on each other as well as use it on missions.

Ukyou sank a little, as she was afraid that she had done something wrong. "Uh... Sailor Saturn gave it to me and told me to go help you. You have to understand, the building was shaking when that thing was running down the street and we had no idea what was going on. I ran outside and saw it kicking you." She looked at Sailor Sun with a tear in her eye. "I thought it was going to kill you Ran-chan."

Sun closed her eyes. "Please call me Sailor Sun when I'm wearing my... er... dress."

"Sorry. But it was going to kill you! What else could I do? I aimed that thing and said the words she told me to say. Next thing I knew, it was sending out this bright beam and I carved that thing up like a roast pig. Next thing I know, I'm back in the store next to the Senshi's bed."

Sailor Moon stood forward and held Ukyou's hand. "What you did was a brave thing. Thank you. We won't ever forget this." She turned to Sailor Sun with a shine in her eyes. "Sun, don't you have something for me?"

"Oh yeah. Io, could I have that money now?"

Io pulled out the few yen notes from behind her blue bow and gave it to the red head. "Don't spend it all in one place."

"But that's what I intend to do. Sun Beam Transport!" She made a mischievous smile and flashed out.

Mars was amused since she had an idea of what Sun was getting for Sailor Moon. "What's Sun getting for you?"

"Oh... She owes me. I'm going to collect." Moon smiled back to Mars as her eyes turned into little pictures of sundaes.

Mars softly muttered. "Figures that you're always thinking with your stomach."

Sailor Mercury tapped Ukyou's shoulder to get her attention. "I'm curious. Did Saturn do anything with you or to you before she gave you her Glaive? As far as I know, only she could use the magic in her weapon."

Ukyou tried to remember what happened while lowering her head in thought. "Yes, I remember now. She touched me and I glowed for a second. Was that it?"

"I think so. We can temporarily assign our powers to someone else but it takes a lot of effort." Mercury scanned Ukyou with her computer to check on her wounds or lack of them as the case may be. "Well, it looks like you're the picture of health. Can you stand up?" Mercury continued her scans on Ukyou to make sure that the healing was fine.

"I've been waiting for you to say that." Ukyou cast off her blankets to reveal her hospital gown. She shook her legs and wiggled her toes. "I can't believe that this is possible." She felt her left knee and slid her hand downward to her ankle. "It's as if it had never been injured."

Mercury stood by her bed and offered her a hand but Konatsu appeared instantly to help up his mistress. Mercury continued her scans. "Let's see if you've got the use of your new leg. I think you might need some therapy to recover." Konatsu slowly helped the chef up on her feet. Ukyou wobbled a bit almost falling to the floor. She caught herself with the side of the bed but in moments she was walking around the room.

"Brr... The floor's cold."

Konatsu produced Ukyou's shoes and stockings. "Do you want to put on your shoes?"

"Actually, I want to feel the floor." She walked around without any effort or discomfort. She spun on her big toe like a dancer with her hair flowing outward in the air. "I feel great!" She stopped spinning, stood and made a pose. "I feel like I've had a week long vacation!"

Mercury finished her readings. "Well, as far as I can tell. There's no reason for you to stay here anymore. I can't find anything wrong with you." She snapped her Sailor Scout computer shut and stowed it away into pocket space.

"Great!" She looked at her lack of attire. "I want to get back into my old clothes."

"Here you go." Konatsu pulled out of his kimono a small stack of neatly folded clothes and held it out for his mistress.

"Thanks!" She took her clothes and shoes from Konatsu and went to the tiny bathroom to change in private.

Jupiter watched in amazement as the chef marched across the cold floor. "Mercury, are you sure she's ok? I mean, she just grew a leg and now she's walking as if nothing's happened."

Sailor Io sat down in Sun's chair. "I'm sure she's ok now. You can't keep her down."

Nodoka tapped Io on her shoulder to get her attention. "Well, if it's all right with you Io, I'd like to talk to you and Sun in private when she gets back."

Io turned to face her mother in law with a hint of worry. "Whatever for mother?"

"Well, I've got good news but I want to tell the two of you so I don't have to repeat myself."

"I'm sure Sun would like hear some good news for a change. We've had enough bad news for the last few days it would be a nice change of pace."

Sailor Moon whined. "What's taking Sun so long? I didn't take this long to get here."

Mars commented, "Can it dumpling head. The only reason we got here so quickly was because you said it was an emergency."

Moon stood on her toes to look Mars in the eye. "Well it was! Ukyou was in trouble."

Jupiter got between the two Senshi. "Will the two of you stop arguing? I'm tired of it."

Neo Moon leaned against the wall laughing at some sort of private joke. "Mars? Moon? Stopping their argument? Ha ha ha!"

Ukyou opened the door of the bathroom wearing her black leggings, blue chef's jacket and white bow in her hair. "Now that's more like it. Now, has anyone seen my peel and my katana?"

A bright flash appeared right in front of Ukyou startling the girl. Sailor Sun was balancing two banana splits and several parfaits in her arms. "Could someone give me a hand?"

Moon lunged forward snatching the two splits. "Yes!" With the trademark grace and speed of Usagi Tsukino she promptly set to break her speed record in the consumption of confectionary delights.

"Mom! Control yourself!" Neo Moon took some parfaits that Sun held that looked like they were about to fall to ground. "Is that better Sun?"

Sun nodded then handed out desserts to everyone by name. "Yeah, thanks. Now I got one for everybody I think, let's see. Here is yours Mercury, Neo Moon, Jupiter, Venus, Io, Mars, Ukyou, Konatsu, and Mom." She glanced at the blur that was Sailor Moon. "I see she's already got hers. That leaves this one for me." She licked her lips in anticipation. "Wow! I didn't know that being a Senshi had benefits like this." She munched on her parfait with absolutely no feminine grace whatsoever.

Mercury waited until her bite was swallowed before asking. "Benefits?"

"Why free ice cream of course! I beamed into my favorite parlor in Nerima and they just gave me this stuff. Man! I should do that more often."

Io got angry. "Sun! It's already bad enough that you scam free food as a girl but that's going too far!"

"Hey! With all the stuff I went through yesterday, I deserve a break." She sped up her devouring because she saw that Moon was almost done with the second banana split and years of eating with her father kicked in her food survival instincts. She wasn't going to let Moon near her parfait.

Nodoka glared at her daughter. "Sun, please be more ladylike in your eating. How many times have I told you to chew your food and take the time to enjoy the flavor?"

Sun swallowed the last bite and licked her lips clean. "Aw, mom."

"Shall I step up your bridal training?"

Sun gulped. "I'll behave! Honest I will!"

Nodoka directed her attention to the leader of the Senshi. "And you young lady, you are not setting a fine example either."

Sailor Moon answered with a burp as she licked her spoon clean. "Sorry Mrs. Saotome."

Nodoka shot a glance at the tall pink haired Senshi. "You're her daughter?"

Neo Moon looked away as she hid her parfait from her mother's view. "Yes I am."

"I must say Sailor Moon, you've aged very gracefully."

Most of the Senshi gave looks of embarrassment as Sailor Moon seeped into the floor. Moon spoke in a very soft voice. "I'm not that old."

Neo Moon gave a small laugh. "I'll explain it for you Mrs. Saotome. I'm visiting from the future and I'm her future daughter. I haven't been born yet in this century."

Nodoka gave Kasumi response number one. "Oh my."

Io took the last bite of her parfait. "Well, mother, could you now tell us the good news." She tossed her spent spoon in the trash.

Sun looked at her mother. "What news? Did Kuno finally get a clue and move to Africa?"

"Kuno? No, it isn't about him. I've sold my property and I came here to start looking for a new place for all of us to stay." She smiled at her daughter. "We can be together again."

"What about Dad?" Sun looked sullen. "You know he's going to want to come around from time to time."

Nodoka had a gleam in her eye that indicated that she meant business. It was the same gleam she had when she was about to invoke the seppuku agreement on Ranma when she thought he was a cross-dresser. "Don't worry about your father. I've made... arrangements." She showed her teeth in a predatory smile.

Sun and Io looked at each other in trepidation. Sun felt a little better at the revelation her mother gave her about her father. "It you say so Mom. You know what Dad's going to say if he ever found about this." She tugged on her dress for effect.

Sun's mother smiled even more. "It's not like you hadn't had practice keeping secrets, right Ranko? Or shall I say, Ranko and Mr. Panda."

"You know Mom. I kinda like that idea." Sun laughed. "I think it'll be fun doing to Dad what we did to you all that time."

"At least in this case, you'll simply be who you really are most of the time instead of pretending to be someone you're not. Besides..." Nodoka gazed at the ceiling in delight. "He deserves it after... after..." She started to form a tear.

Sun rushed to her mother's side holding onto her shoulders to support her. "Mom! Mom, I'm not leaving you again."

"I know." She held her daughter in return. "I know."

Venus and Moon were swooning at the scene in front of them. Venus sighed with hearts in her eyes. "Oh, how beautiful!"

Neo Moon grabbed Moon and Venus's hands. "Let's go. We've done enough damage here. Jupiter?"

Jupiter, Mars and Mercury formed the rest of the circle for the Sailor teleport. Mercury called out to Ukyou. "Ukyou, I'll stop by your restaurant day after tomorrow to see how you're doing."

Ukyou waved to the circle of Senshi. "I can't wait!" The girls glowed then vanished from sight.

Konatsu cooed from the corner. "Ah, to be a Senshi, it's every girl's dream."

Ukyou wanted to say something about Konatsu's real gender but decided against it. "Let's go home."

Sun pulled back from her mother's embrace. "Want a ride? I can get you both back to Nerima in a minute."

Ukyou thought about it for moment. "No." She tapped her new foot to the ground. "I feel like walking today. By the way, where's my baker's peel?"

Io answered. "Your stuff's downstairs. They don't allow weapons in the hospital so when we brought them they placed it in storage. You can get them back when you check out."

"Well then, I guess I'm checking out." She walked over to Sun and kissed her on the cheek much to Io's dismay. "Thanks, Ran-chan."

Sun grumbled. "It's Sailor Sun when I'm in the dress. Please remember that, the disguise magic doesn't work when you're calling out my name."

"Ok, Sailor Sun." Ukyou swung around and kissed Io on the cheek. "Thanks Akane-chan. Thank you very much." She backed away to the door. "C'mon Konatsu, let's try out my new leg." She opened the door and strutted out with her kimono-clad kunoichi close behind.

Nodoka embraced her two family members. "Well, I've got to check out too." She touched her bandage on her head. "Although I think I might need a little help getting home."

Io held her mother-in-laws hand. "You're coming home with us."

Sun placed her hands on Nodoka's as well. "Let's go home together."


"What do you mean you lost it?" Ukyou was shouting at the admissions officer. "Those things are irreplaceable! I want my katana and my spatula back and I want 'em NOW!"

Konatsu slid into the shadows to avoid attracting attention. He snuck around while everyone was distracted to sneak a peek at the storage room and get Ukyou's things.

"Now Miss Kuonji, please calm yourself." The security guard held out his hands in a warding gesture. "I'm certain we can straighten this out."

"You're damn right you're going to straighten this out." Ukyou's battle aura flared up setting a small scrap of paper on the desk on fire. "Fork over my stuff before I get mad."

The admissions office pulled up Ukyou's file on the computer monitor. "I don't have anything listed that belongs to you. You were a carry-in patient admitted yesterday for... Uh..." She glanced over her desk to look at Ukyou's lower body. "I'm sorry, I must have the wrong file." She typed a few keys on the keyboard. "Do you spell your name differently? I only have one Ukyou Kuonji listed and she's not you."

"Now we're getting somewhere." She scribbled her kanji on a piece of paper and handed it to the officer. "I was admitted yesterday morning with a missing leg."

The officer froze, stood up, looked at Ukyou's leggings again and sat back down. "Did you say that you had a missing leg?"

"Oh yeah." She looked at her hand. "My hand too. But that doesn't matter anyways, just where's my stuff?"

The officer just sat there in stunned silence. "Uh..."

Konatsu appeared behind Ukyou whispering into her ear. "I've got your stuff. Don't worry about it, mistress."

"Oh..." She whispered back and continued her tirade. "Never mind, I'll be back later. Where do I sign to get out of here?"

"Here's your discharge papers, Miss Kuonji." The admissions officer noticed that it was marked that the bill was to be sent to the Japanese government. She thought to herself, "This girl must have some powerful friends."

"Thanks! But you really need to improve your food. Why don't you serve okonomiyaki to your patients?" Konatsu waved for Ukyou to follow him out. "Gotta go." The two of them exited the building.

The officer stood up again to watch the pair leave. "Wow, they've really improved on the artificial legs. I can't tell that that's a prosthetic leg."

Outside the hospital, Ukyou stopped her kunoichi. "I hope you've got my things because I'm not leaving without 'em."

"Of course, my mistress." He pulled out of his kimono Ukyou's katana and spatula. How he was able to hide a battle spatula on his person in a tight fitting kimono was a secret only known by hidden weapons masters such as Konatsu and Mousse.

"Konatsu-chan, please call me Ukyou. I don't really like it when you call me mistress. It gives people the wrong idea." Ukyou strapped her spatula back onto her back and her katana to her belt.

Konatsu bowed in appreciation. "Of course Ukyou-chan."

"That doesn't sound right either. How about just Ukyou or maybe Ucchan?"

Konatsu held his hands to his chin like a sweet little girl. "Ucchan?" He bowed again. "Anything for you Ucchan."

Ukyou groaned as she regretted her decision. "Now listen..." She felt a strange tingle in her hair as if she was receiving a signal. "Uh..." She focused on the little voice that she was hearing.

Konatsu got up from his bow. "Is there something wrong Ucchan?"

"Shhh..." She held up her finger to her lips as she listened to the unseen voices coming from her head. She could almost swear that she had odangos in her hair but brushed off the thought since she never wore her hair like that. She heard a distant scream. "That way! Hurry!" Ukyou darted forward taking to the rooftops with Konatsu in pursuit.

Konatsu strained to keep up with Ukyou's incredible speed. "Where're we going?"

"Someone's in trouble. Faster!" Ukyou accelerated jumping off of a roof, over a street, and onto the roof of the building on the other side.

Konatsu had to drop to the street, run on top of cars and leap off an awning to follow Ukyou's high speed lead. He was rapidly getting tired and slowed down to maintain his pace without succumbing to exhaustion.

Ukyou ran for a full minute making jumps and sprinting at the speed of a Senshi. She stopped on a single story building in a suburb to get her bearings. She closed her eyes and concentrated on the voice she had heard and felt that she was very close to her target. A police siren wailed nearby attracting her attention making the girl dart toward the sound.

She stood in a street corner in the middle of a residential neighborhood and saw several people screaming and running in her direction. Ukyou jumped over the small crowd and ran in the opposite direction to whatever frightened them. A loud growl instantly told Ukyou what she needed to know as she unhooked her battle spatula. She ran around a corner finding a baby Godzilla clawing at a sealed sports utility vehicle with a man inside trying to stay away from the beast's claws. The monster beat against the driver side door to gain entrance.

"Hey! Lizard face!" Ukyou made a pose pointing her spatula at the three and a half meter tall iguana. "What you're doing pisses me off and in the name of the Moon, I'm going to punish you!" Ukyou blinked her eyes as she realized what exactly she had just spoken. "Ah, the hell with it!" She ran toward the beast as it completely ignored Ukyou's speech.

She swung her spatula at the creature's head to stun it. It retaliated with a swing of its tail, which Ukyou jumped over. She did a cartwheel then spun the blade outward to deliver a cut to the thing's back. The monster reeled back and inhaled to launch a breath attack.

Ukyou jumped out of the way as a column of blue fire roasted the pavement she once occupied. "Ok, that's it. I've had enough of you and everyone who looks like you." She tossed her spatula aside, unsheathed her katana and landed on the roof of the car. "Time to say goodnight. Yah!" She swung down cleaving the beast in two.


Konatsu ran toward the scene of the battle. Ukyou was cleaning her weapon with a towel she got from police officer. "What took you so long?"

"You could've waited for me my Mist... Ucchan." He gulped air as he caught his breath.

"People were in trouble. I got here just in time." She pointed to the body on the ground. "The living alligator bag over there was about to kill someone."

Konatsu stood incredulously looking at the baby Godzilla that Ukyou felled. "You could've gotten hurt fighting those things again, Ucchan."

"I had it completely under control." She got up from the ice chest she was sitting on. "I need your help."

"You've only need to ask. What shall I do for you?"

Ukyou grinned and pulled out a carving knife. "We've got some work to do."


Ukyou and Konatsu were getting the restaurant ready for business. Konatsu was sweeping while Ukyou was cleaning the grill. Passersby were gathering outside waiting for the shop curtain to go up. Several people were muttering among themselves at the new shop sign out front.

Ukyou poured the batter and cooked up an okonomiyaki. She added the new toppings and made sure it was cooked all the way through. She poured her sauce and took a bite.

"Oh no!"

"What's the matter Ucchan?" Konatsu had a look of worry.

"I was hoping for... I don't know. Something different." Ukyou took another bite confirming her suspicions. "It figures. Oh well, let 'em in anyways."

"Very well, but what's the matter with your new recipe."

Ukyou sighed. "It tastes just like chicken."

Konatsu placed the shop curtain up and the restaurant was filled to capacity in moments. Ukyou's flyer with Konatsu to spread it around town did the trick. Ucchan's was going to do the most business it had ever done in months.

A flyer fell from the hand of one of the patrons onto the floor.

It read...

"Taste the terror of Tokyo! Gojira okonomiyaki exclusively at Ucchan's okonomiyaki while supplies last!"

Author's Notes: Please review my story. It makes me feel oh so happy and prevents me from reading your dirty little mind and publishing what I find.

Last edited on January 25th, 2007

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